I am feeling a little bit better now. Once again picking myself up, little by little. I am wondering what I will do different this time... I think that by every time this happens, I get a little bit better at distancing myself. It is what happens when you push a person down long enough.

It gets easier to stand up again, because I am tired of letting her get to me. I am tired of her saying that she loves me unconditionally then says those things to me, that I don't care about her or my grandmother. She says that she is my mother and that she cares about me. But every time she sends me those messages I am thinking that she loves the pain and feeling like crap more than she loves me. Always think she doesn't know any better. I don't think she knows what she does. But even so it doesn't mean that I have to stand for it. I am getting closer to the breaking point.

Well, I am picking myself up again... Little by little... Still hopeful)))