I wrote this today:

We are
Nothing more
Nothing less
We are what we are
What else could there be
Than a deeper understanding of our own beingness
We become the awakened


One can really see what is circling around in my brain nowadays)))
I guess there are more room for writing now that I have managed not to be panicking about not writing:)

The Road not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth ;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.


By Robert Frost

I turned off the television early today. After LOST. It was the Desmond episode. I am actually going to miss one episode, but I don't think I care too much, since it is because I'll be in London at the time. I might think for a sort moment that LOST is on in Norway at this time, but I don't think I will shed much tears. I am however thinking what the hell is this island. It is getting weird to say the least.

I think I spend to much time with noise around me. Right now, I don't have the tv on nor any music. The only sound is from my computer; a monotone sound that can easily fade into the background. It is strange how thoughts come then. The deeper thoughts at that. There is so much in A new earth. So much information. I am going to buy it in paperback in London. The first day I am there if I can get to a bookstore that day. I just have to make sure that we do Oxford street or something:) I need to have it in bookform so that I am not depended on the computer to be able to read it. I am in chapter seven now. I am going to make sure that it is not just theory this time. The great thing is that it doesn't matter where you are in life or what you do. It just takes anything you believe in to another level, even if you don't believe in anything too. It is great. I really don't think I have ever read anything like it before...

I haven't fuzzed over writing in a long time. I just know I am going to write. That's all I need to know. When the time is right, I will write. Right now, there are other things I need to understand. And I do write bits and pieces now and then, but I don't obsess over it anymore. That is actually a good feeling. I write my morning pages, and whenever I feel like writing. But I don't feel bad for not writing anymore. It is a relief. I wrote some time in March that I wanted to write to the heart, not the mind. Or from the stillness behind the thoughts. I just need to find that in me and when I do, I believe that the words will come. I am changing my thoughts and emotions little by little I guess. Trying to draw my attention to the now whenever I remember it. I find writing the morning pages a good exercise, because my mind tends to wander away from the page. So I try to stay on the page no matter what comes out.

Oh, I found these great thin notebooks yesterday. They were exactly what I was looking for. I wanted to make a London book so to speak, where I can write my morning pages and take notes and stuff. I bought two just in case I get really creative while there. I am going to be gone in ten days, so who knows)) I get to visit a Starbucks now)) If nothing has changed since last time I stayed at Earl's Court, there is a Starbucks just by the train station, and not that far from the hotel I think. Drinking coffee and writing goes great together)))

"Lost" by David Wagoner

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.